2023

2023

For the most part, things were looking up for 2023.

Although my company adopted a hybrid work week, I opted to go back to the office 5 days per week. It got me out of the basement, out of the house, and out of that neighbourhood.

Still not a fan of waking up at 4am but if that’s what has to be done for now, then so be it. 

Another birthday came and went for the Italian and another father’s day and still no acknowledgement or contact from the ‘children’. 

I know this hurts him deeply and I hate seeing him hurt like this. Even though he tries not to show it. 

He didn’t do anything to deserve this sort of treatment but their whore mother has done such a number on those ‘children’, there’s probably no going back.

The Italian’s brother went through a similar thing with his son but his ex wasn’t a whore. I’ve met her and she seemed quite genuine. The distance there was purely the decision of his son, and that’s all I know about that.

But he keeps telling the Italian to be patient and they’ll come around. 

I sometimes have sort of day dreams of winning the lottery and buying a big house by the lake with a pool, and lots of bedrooms. Then I would throw a house warming party for family, that the ‘children’ would ‘accidentally’ find out about and show up un announced, only to be turned away by me because the party and the house were for family only.

I know it’s childish and petty but I’m going to let myself have these thoughts every once in a while – it makes me smile.

And nobody can tell me that they’ve never dreamt of having what’s known as ‘fuck-you money’ – there’s a reason it’s called that.

Work was starting to pick up and more and more people were coming back to the office on a regular basis. 

I think, like me, my more seasoned co-workers were growing tired of being in their home offices, basements, spare bedrooms.

The younger crowd still don’t understand that if office spaces aren’t occupied on a regular basis, corporations will start to lean towards money saving methods like getting rid of the brick/mortar office spaces as well as employees. 

Like what happened in our company and our offices.

People who reported to a manager in our office but worked 100% remotely – were let go.

The reception position in our office was eliminated because people weren’t having meetings in the boardrooms in the reception area, and therefore, the receptionist was let go.

However, all of the duties that were the responsibility of the receptionist have now fallen on me sort of by default – because there’s nobody else willing to take on these duties; nobody is willing to do these things for themselves let alone for anyone else.

And with the Italian not working, and will not work again, I need the job. So I continue to do whatever needs to be done in the office so that I don’t become irrelevant – I gots to keep getting paid.

The running joke with people my age is “I’ll retire when I’m dead”- but not really a joke.

One good thing that happened for the Italian is that he finally started receiving disability payments and even two years back pay. This was thanks to the social worker that was assigned to his case. She really showed up for the Italian and I’m so grateful for her. And it also gave the Italian peace of mind – also super grateful for that!

In 2023 I travelled to sunny SoCal to visit family twice! Once with my mother in the early spring and then again on my own in the mid-late summer – at the height of the glorious heat and humidity. 

I highly recommend travelling alone. Not having to worry about anyone else but yourself is an independent introvert’s dream come true. 

By the end of the year, still nothing from the ‘children’ but then I really didn’t expect very much.